


Lovers and Secret Worlds

by controlofwhatido



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-27
Updated: 2012-12-27
Packaged: 2017-11-22 16:03:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/611652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/controlofwhatido/pseuds/controlofwhatido
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set in 1910s New England, Blaine Anderson is home from college for the summer and intends on spending his summer months riding his horses with his friends around the Anderson estate. He definitely doesn’t expect to fall for their new stable hand, who doesn’t seem to want to have anything to do with him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lovers and Secret Worlds

**Author's Note:**

> Posted in June on LJ for the KBL_Reversebang challenge 2012. (The art is available on my tumblr) My first thank you goes to my artist, because without her, this wouldn’t exist. Thank you for creating a piece that inspired me to write this. A million and one thanks to Jenny, without her, this would certainly not be what it is now. She held my hand through it, and cleaned it up rather nicely with her beta. Thank you to Nikki, for your uplifting cheering section when I needed it. :) I tried to keep it as true to the time period as possible, but I did take some liberties here and there.

As soon as Blaine steps out of the car, he is immediately greeted by an armful of best friend and can barely see through the massive amount of black hair blowing around his face.

“Santana! It’s been so long, I’ve missed you!”

He’s exhausted from the train ride and the always bumpy car ride, but still has strength in him to hold her up and spin her around, because it has been too long since he has held her in his arms.

“Look at you, my big college man. Never stay away that long again, ya hear?” She drops to the ground and holds him at arm’s length, looking him over.  “Damn, you look good.”

Blaine shakes his head and turns to grab his suitcases from the back of the car. “Santana, such language for a lady.”

“Oh, let me, Mr. Anderson. I will bring these up to your room, if you please?”

Blaine smiles at Brittany and nods, knowing he’ll have to readjust to having people wait on him hand and foot. He had become used to doing everything for himself while he was away. “Thank you, Brittany. I’d like to unpack those myself. If you could just put them in my room, I’d appreciate it.”

She curtsies and reaches for the suitcases. “Anything you need, Mr. Anderson. I could prepare some lemonade for you and Miss Lopez, too?”

Blaine arches an eyebrow at Santana in question and she shrugs.

“We’ll have it out on the patio, Brittany. Blaine has had a long day and I’m sure he’s tired, thank you,” Santana says and grabs hold of Blaine’s elbow. “C’mon, I need to hear all about what’s happened since your last letter.”

Blaine lets himself to be tugged up toward the patio and hears Rory swear behind him as he tries to get the car going again. It isn’t the easiest machine – Blaine is just glad he doesn’t have to deal with it often. He prefers horses much more; he can hear his own in the distance and his whole being aches with how much he’s missed them.

“Oh, I can see it in your face, we’ll go riding first thing tomorrow morning, you’ll fall flat on your ass with how tired you are if we go out now,” Santana laughs and pushes him down by the shoulders into the closest chair.

He shakes his head and crosses his left leg over his right. “Be happy my parents aren’t home yet, San. If they heard words like those coming from your mouth you’d never be allowed over here again. I think my mother would pass out from fright.”

Santana waves her hand in dismissal. “Oh, your mother loves me. I’m a perfect lady around her. Anyways,” she drops her voice and leans forward, “who else would you get to gossip about boys with?”

Blaine looks around to make sure no one was in earshot and pushes her away. “Santana!” She’s the only one that knows his secret, the only one he trusts. At school he tries to keep himself so busy that he doesn’t have much time to think about it, because there is no there for him to be completely honest with. There probably never will be. He shakes his head and looks up when Brittany approaches them with a tray of lemonade. “Thank you, Brittany. Would you like to join us?” He immediately knows she won’t, but he always likes to try, just in case.

Brittany sets the tray down and shakes her head. “Oh, no. I couldn’t.  I need to head down to the stables to help Kurt in a few moments, anyway. Have a pleasant afternoon Mr. Anderson, Miss Lopez.”

Blaine watches her walk away and turns to pour Santana a glass first, before himself. “Kurt? Did we get a new stable hand? What happened to Burt? My parents never mentioned anything in their letters.”

Santana takes the glass from him, sipping before nodding. “Kurt is Burt’s son, from what I gather. I’ve only heard gossip from Brittany, but she said Burt had fallen ill, and Kurt has been taken care of your precious horses for a few months now.”

“Oh,” Blaine says. “That’s awful. I hope he’s not terribly ill? Burt and I got along well. He never spoke of a son, though.”

Smiling, Santana sets her glass down and taps her fingers in a steady rhythm on her leg. “I’ve only seen Kurt on the grounds once, but I’m sure you’ll  _appreciate_  him, if you know what I mean.”

Blaine sputters, barely able to keep himself from choking on the lemonade he had just sipped.

“Oh, Blaine, it’s so easy to ruffle your feathers,” she laughs. “Don’t worry, I’ll be a good girl, I promise. Now, tell me. Any good news to tell? Don’t leave out  _any_  details. Your letters are always so cryptic and casual.”

Blaine sets his glass down. “That’s because my roommates are nosy assholes – pardon my language, m’lady,” he snorts. “I’ll tell you everything when we ride down to the lake tomorrow, okay? I don’t want to be interrupted by my parents, I’m sure Rory will be back with them any moment now.”

Santana nods and stands, brushing her hands against her slacks. “That’s is my cue to leave. Nothing like a droll Anderson family reunion to bore me to death. I’ll come fetch you bright and early, and we can see if you even remember how to ride, yeah?”

He can forgo his manners with Santana, so he stays in his chair and gives her a tiny wave. “I’m sure Warbler will be more than happy to see me, and you know you’d be welcome at dinner, San. I’d love to have you there, keep me from trying to entertain my parents with college stories.”

She leans over and kisses his temple, and he can smell her perfume – a scent he missed terribly while he was away. “As appealing as that sounds, I’ll pass. I have my own family dinner to attend, and I’m sure you’d hear my grandmother shouting from here if I missed it. Tomorrow, Blaine. We’ll ride all day, soak up some sun, and you will tell me your stories.”

* * *

 

Blaine wakes up far too early and dresses in his riding gear. He knows he has some time before Santana shows, but he is eager to see his horses again.

He whistles happily as he walks swiftly down to the stables. A soft breeze whips past him and the sweet scent of lilacs fills his senses. It is so  _good_  to be home. He loves school – he knows he is supremely lucky to be getting such an education – but he misses his friends and long days at the lake with his horses.

He hears a wonderful sound as he approaches the stables – someone is singing, and it’s  _magical_. Music is something he rarely hears at home unless he is the one playing it, but this voice, goodness, this  _voice –_ Blaine must find out who it belongs to. He quickens his step and rounds the corner of the building, almost tripping over his own feet when he finds the source of the sound.

The boy Blaine sees looks like an  _angel_. The morning light is shining in through the roof and lighting his hair just  _so_ , and since the boy hasn’t noticed Blaine yet he is still singing. Blaine feels something bubble up inside him that he really has never felt before.

Santana has always been trustworthy with her knowledge of his…leanings. But it has almost always been an abstract feeling – until now. He leans against the wood and prays that the boy doesn’t notice him yet, because he wants to keep listening. The boy’s voice his high and unlike anything he’s ever heard before, but it’s mesmerizing. 

He feels silly and slightly uncomfortable just watching this boy (oh, this is…Kurt? Was that what Santana had said the new stable hand’s name was?) but he can’t seem to make his presence known. He watches as Kurt brushes Shortcake and continues to sing with his back to Blaine, his hips swaying slightly with the song.

He has to turn away, just has to. He rolls his body against the stable so he’s leaning against the outside wall and breathes hard. Kurt is still singing – has finished one song and started another – and Blaine has to close his eyes to steady himself.

He hasn’t even seen Kurt’s face and he’s already overcome with feelings he doesn’t quite know what to do with. Before he has time to really think about anything, he hears footsteps approaching and knows they’re Santana’s. He turns his head and holds up his finger to his mouth in a quieting gesture, so she doesn’t ruin the moment. He still wants to listen to Kurt.

She quirks an eyebrow but stays quiet, brushes a quick kiss against his cheek and leans against the wall beside him. He grasps her hand and leans his head against her shoulder until Kurt finishes his song. Then he’s suddenly being tugged into the stables by his hand and wants to curse at Santana for being so bold, but before he can open his mouth he’s face to face with –  _oh_.

Possibly the most beautiful boy he’s ever seen – he’s even more beautiful from the front, and Blaine has to remind himself to breathe.

“Good morning, Kurt,” Santana says with a tug on Blaine’s hand.

Kurt nods his head in a bow and smiles. “Good morning, ma’am, sir.”

Blaine finally finds his voice and shakes his head. “None of that, please. This is Santana Lopez and my name is Blaine Anderson – very nice to meet you, Kurt.”

“Of course, Mr. Anderson,” Kurt nods. He glances around. “I can saddle your horse, if you’d just let me know which one is yours, please.”

Santana drops Blaine’s hand and whips her hair into a neat ponytail to keep her hair out of her face as she rides. “That won’t be necessary, Kurt. Blaine here always gets Warbler ready by himself – he’s an annoying little prick –“

“Santana!”

“Oh hush, shorty,” Santana waves him off. “Like I was saying, Blaine likes to do everything he can. You could get Starshine ready for me, though. And the Euro saddle is mine, mind you.”

“Sure thing, Miss Lopez,” Kurt nods and turns to head toward the supplies.

Blaine can’t even allow himself to follow Kurt with his eyes, or look at Santana right now. Instead, he walks over to Warbler and smiles widely. “Hey boy,” he says softly. “Missed you.” He laughs when Warbler flicks his head at him and he reaches up to soothe him. “Ready to ride? I sure am.”

He distracts himself by preparing Warbler for their ride; the entire process feels calming and familiar. When he’s in the saddle at last, Blaine closes his eyes briefly to take in the feeling. He loves all of his horses, but Warbler is, and always has been,  _his_. Most of the others have been unofficially adopted by his friends, since they ride them so often during the summers.

“Race you, Anderson,” Santana calls from atop Starshine and Blaine signals for Warbler to move.

He takes one last look back at Kurt – who has his back to them – before he follows Santana out of the stables. He wants to say something to Kurt, something witty to make him laugh or at least smile, but words are failing him again. And too soon Warbler has walked him out of Kurt’s hearing range, so Blaine urges the horse to start into a trot.

“Someone has a crush,” Santana sing-songs as Starshine trots alongside Warbler. “I told you you’d appreciate him.”

Blaine rolls his eyes and hangs his head. “I don’t even know him.”

“Eyes up, shorty,” Santana scolds. “You looked like a lovesick puppy back there, don’t think I didn’t notice.”

Blaine doesn’t even bother with responding and just lets his body rise along with the rhythm of Warbler’s trot. It feels so good to be riding again. He wants to take Warbler into a full gallop, but he knows that it has been a while since Warbler has had such an exercise and he’ll need some warming up – something Blaine can save for another day.

They reach the lake at the edge of the Anderson property and Blaine stays on Warbler for a few moments to just take it all in again. This is his sanctuary, where he has spent most of his summers, and where he can’t wait to spend all of this summer – surrounded by his friends, of course.

“Are you going to sit up there all day or are you going to join me and relax in the sun?”

“It’s quiet without the others,” Blaine says before patting Warbler’s neck and dismounting. He ties him to the same post with Starshine and walks over to where Santana is already sprawled out on the grass. “But it’ll be nice to just have some time with you for a week, before everyone else comes home.”

Santana reaches out for him and pulls him down on the grass beside her; he lands with a soft  _oof_. “Beautiful day,” he sighs and leans his head on her shoulder. “Almost warm enough to swim.”

“Nick and Jeff would already be in the water, complaining about their gonads freezing off,” she laughs and cards her fingers through his hair. “Silly boys.”

Blaine nods and closes his eyes. He loves that he can be himself completely around Santana – no expectations to be an Anderson Man, no frills, no nothing – he can just be Blaine. “So,” he says softly, with a hint of a smile, “Kurt is pretty handsome, right?”

Santana pushes him off and laughs loud and clear. “I knew it! Lordy, I knew you’d think so!”

* * *

 

Blaine doesn’t get to hear Kurt sing again for the rest of the week, much to his dismay. He even approaches the stables quietly every morning in hopes to catch him unaware, but Kurt is always quiet. Blaine can’t seem to get more than a few words out of him, either.

He rides with Santana every day, each day a little longer than the one before. Santana is an excellent rider – almost good as he is – which she should be, since he taught her everything he knows. They always end up at the lake, sprawled out in the grass, talking about anything and everything. It won’t be so peaceful once the rest of their friends return home, so Blaine tries to soak up as much time with her as he can, while he can.

By the weekend, he knows he’s on his own because Santana always has family obligations. He eats breakfast with his parents and waits to hear if he’s needed for anything important before he heads down to the stables again.

He’s not surprised when there’s no sign of Kurt – Burt always took light days on the weekends, too – but he can’t help feel a slight pang of sadness because he almost had his hopes up to try to finally talk to Kurt alone.

He saddles up and mounts Warbler with ease, the routine fast and familiar to him. After a decent warm up, he signals Warbler into a full gallop and takes off toward the well beaten path around the estate.

Riding is easy, something he can do without thinking. He lets his body flow with the movements of the gallop, keeps his legs tight against Warbler’s middle, and holds the reins steady in his hands. His thoughts stray to Kurt – the brief moments of time he’d been able to see him every morning. His excitement at just  _seeing_  Kurt grew stronger with each passing day.

How could he feel such a way after only meeting him a mere week ago? And barely speaking to him, at that?

Blaine just feels drawn to Kurt, like he needs to know more about him. He doesn’t want to scare Kurt off – of course not. He knows how to act around boys that please his eyes, so he doesn’t give away his secret. Even though he hardly knows Kurt, he certainly feels more for him than he ever has for any other boy.

He gets so lost in his thoughts about Kurt he doesn’t even realize that he has come back around to the stables. He quickly dismounts Warbler and nuzzles his head, brushes his hand along his neck and takes a deep breath.

“Welcome back, Mr. Anderson. Would you like me to care for Warbler while you go up for lunch?”

Blaine jumps at the sound and turns toward Kurt. He wants to insist that Kurt call him by his first name but if there’s one thing he’s learned over the years, it’s that he can insist all he wants – it’ll never happen. Also, his parents would throw a fit.

“No, no, of course not,” Blaine says, finally finding his voice. “I’ll get him settled back in.” When Kurt starts to walk away Blaine bites his lip. “You – you could help me, though? Keep me company? I mean, I just – “

Kurt turns back and looks at Blaine with wide, curious eyes. Finally, he nods and starts toward the stable door. “Of course, Mr. Anderson.”

Blaine hadn’t wanted it to seem like an order, or a request, but Kurt is already preparing water for Warbler by the time Blaine walks in with him. “So, um. Nice day?” Blaine rolls his eyes at himself as soon as he’s spoken.

Kurt looks up from where he’s unbuckling the saddle on Warbler and nods. “Yes, rather nice weather. I have been able to get a lot of work done this week.”

Blaine is usually never at a loss for words but Kurt is making him flustered. He takes a deep breath to steel himself and waits until he has pulled the bridle off Warbler before he tries again. “How is your father doing?”

“Oh, um,” Kurt says softly as he turns to toss the saddle over the divider. “He’s recovering, thank you. Still not well enough to return to work. My step-mother fears he may never fully recover – but I am fully capable of accomplishing all of his tasks, Mr. Anderson.”

“No that’s – that’s not why I was asking, Kurt,” Blaine says, trying to see Kurt over Warbler. “Burt and I got along; I have been genuinely concerned about his well-being.”

“I will let him know that you asked,” Kurt nods. His eyes flick around and Blaine has to hold back his gasp when he sees just how well the light of the sun intensifies their color. “If you don’t mind, sir. If we’re almost finished – I am supposed to meet Brittany for lunch.”

Blaine shakes his head. “No of course not, go ahead. And please, I know you aren’t comfortable calling me Blaine, but please, you needn’t call me sir. We look to be the same age, and I truly hate it.”

Kurt smiles and Blaine feels his knees wobble, because it is the first time he has ever seen him with such a look on his face – and it is beautiful.

“I’ll keep that in mind, Mr. Anderson. Have a good day.”

Blaine feels his heart clench painfully in his chest when he watches Kurt walk away. That smile –  _that smile!_  – Blaine knows he will be walking on air all day. He starts to whistle as he finishes with Warbler, taking extra care as he brushes because he can, and he just can’t stop grinning.

He made Kurt smile.

* * *

 

Blaine is trying to stifle his laughter behind his hand but is failing miserably. It’s just too funny – watching Santana and Sugar together again. He is positive that Kurt must think they’re all crazy.

“You are not a princess, just throw your damn leg up and over and mount up.”

Sugar huffs and slams her hands on her hips. “No, Daddy had steps specially made for me, and that is the only – the  _only_  way I will do this, Santana. You know that.”

Blaine looks over at Jeff and Nick, both already up on their horses, and shakes his head. He walks over to Sugar and holds out his hand. “Would the lady like an assist?”

Sugar beams and grasps Blaine’s hand. “Now here’s a real gentleman, unlike you two dingbats!”

“Hey!” Nick and Jeff both cry.

“Now  _that_  is something I can actually agree with Sugar on,” Santana nods and hauls herself up on Starshine. She points her finger between Nick and Jeff. “You two  _are_ dingbats.”

Blaine is helping Sugar up onto Shortcake when Kurt clears his throat behind him. Blaine whips around so fast he almost pulls Sugar off her stairs – he would’ve, if he hadn’t dropped her hand just in time.

Kurt looks at him with startled eyes. “Uh, Mr. Anderson – I was just going to ask, if you and the rest of your party needed anything else? Before I tend to other things.”

If Blaine could make all his friends disappear right in that moment, he would. As it is, Jeff and Nick are poking at each other and they’re both lucky they have well trained horses. Santana is walking Starshine out of the stables and Sugar is still standing on her stairs, waiting.

“Oh, no, we’re all set, thank you, Kurt,” is all he can think to say. He feels his heart beat a little faster when Kurt nods in his direction before he leaves the stables. It takes him a moment to direct his attention back to Sugar.

* * *

 

Blaine holds Santana against his chest, her wet hair soaking his bare skin. He settles his chin on her shoulder and smiles at his friends. It is so good to have everyone home. The sun beats down against his back and he knows his skin will be quite a bit darker by the time summer is over.

“So, you must tell me, how are the girls looking around Harvard, Blaine?”

Blaine takes a small breath – he is used to talking about girls, used to joining in with his roommates in conversations about the fairer sex – but this time, Santana saves him the trouble of coming up with a lie.

“Nick, first of all, girls look the same around Harvard as they do around Yale, I would assume – and secondly, stop asking Blaine that question when I’m around, it’s not polite.”

Blaine smiles and brushes a kiss against her temple. He’ll thank her later, but he knows she knows. Sugar laughs at something Jeff says and leans back on her elbows, closing her eyes in the sun.

“Daddy doesn’t know I go swimming with three boys, I’m sure he’d have all of your necks if he found out,” she smiles and twirls her toes in the grass.

“Sugar,” Nick says and throws a stick at Jeff’s hair, “you’ve been swimming with us for years – how does he still not know?”

“Oh,” she giggles and flips her pigtails around. “He knows I go horseback riding at the Andersons, but I don’t tell him I get  _scantily clad_  with  _boys_  – what would he think!”

Santana snorts and shakes her chest a little in Blaine’s arms. “Heaven forbid you show your tits a little, Motta.”

“We don’t mind!” Nick and Jeff cheer.

“Such language,  _dear_ ,” Blaine drawls and rolls his eyes. He leans sideways and pulls Santana with him, almost dropping them in the grass before pulling her back up right again. “Shall we dress and head back? Or is anyone up for a race around the property? The horses should be warmed up for that, I would think.”

“Oh, race, for  _sure_ ,” Nick grins and bounces up to his feet. “I am definitely feeling it in my  _bones_  that I can finally beat you this time, Anderson.”

“Right,” Blaine shakes his head. “In your dreams.”

* * *

 

In a rare twist, Blaine manages to have a day free of all of his friends. He loves them dearly and is so glad to have all of them home again, but he has seen so little of Kurt since they arrived. He wants to try to strike up a real conversation, try to get to know him – because Kurt has been on his mind almost constantly.

Kurt wasn’t there when Blaine took Warbler out – probably because Blaine was up as the sun was rising – he really loves to ride as the light is coming through the trees and just warming the earth. He rides until he sweats through his riding clothes and he knows Warbler is due for a break. His head feels clear and his body refreshed – he feels like he could sing ballads all day.

In fact, he is happily singing to himself as he brushes Warbler when he is almost startled out of his skin by Kurt’s voice.

“If I may, you sing really well.”

His heart leaps into his throat and he feels as if he has to swallow it down before he can speak – he hadn’t even heard Kurt approach, he had been so caught up in caring for Warbler and his song. “Th-thank you. You do, too.”

Kurt’s eyes widen and he takes a quick step backward. “You’ve heard me sing, Mr. Anderson?”

“I – yes, the first day we met? You were singing as I walked down here – your voice, it’s remarkable,” Blaine says, and he furrows his eyebrows when Kurt takes another step away from him. “Did I say something wrong?”

“No, I,” Kurt says and diverts his eyes to Shortcake. He reaches up to pet her neck. “No one has heard me sing since – well, no matter. I should get going. I have other chores to do.”

“Wait,” Blaine says and almost reaches out for Kurt. Suddenly all he wants to do is wrap Kurt up in his arms and maybe kiss him but he knows he can’t do that – could never do that. Kurt would never want that, of course not. He thinks maybe Kurt is with Brittany and that’s okay, Blaine can keep his longings and desires to himself. He just needs to work on his self-control. “You don’t have to rush away all the time. I would like it very much... if we could be friends?”

“Friends,” Kurt says slowly, seeming to roll the word around in his mouth as if it is a foreign substance. He ducks his head when Shortcake nudges him. “No, I don’t think so, Mr. Anderson.”

Blaine cocks his head to the side. Has he been too obvious? Surely if he had been, Kurt would’ve told his father and then – oh, he doesn’t want to think about that. He blinks rapidly to try to clear that thought and works his mouth to try to fix things before they spiral out of control. “I don’t mean any – I would just like to get to know you, Kurt.”

“It’s not that easy, Mr. Anderson,” Kurt shakes his head and moves away from Shortcake. “You’re, well – you’re you. And I’m me. As I said, I have chores to do. Have a good day,” he nods his head and exits the stable.

“Kurt,” Blaine tries but it is too late. He understands what Kurt is trying to say but he has never seen it that way. Has never wanted to. He isn’t close with Rory or Brittany or any of the other staff but he has had lengthy conversations with both of them on multiple occasions. Being around Kurt does funny things to his insides – he knows he’ll never know what Kurt smells like, or feels like, or  _tastes_  like, but he would love to just sit next to him and  _talk_. He could live on that. Yeah, he could.

* * *

 

Blaine tugs his drawers up a little higher as he walks out of the lake, the cloth is plastered to his legs and his entire body is dripping with water. He shakes his hair and lets out a shout. “Damn, that feels good!”

Santana laughs and kicks out her feet. “If you get me wet, I swear – you’ll pay, Anderson.”

 “So modest,” Blaine laughs, and flops down on the blanket beside her. He tucks one hand behind his head and looks over at her. “I think I’ve seen more of your body than any boy at school ever even dreams of seeing of a girl until he’s married.”

“That’s because,” she huffs as she turns around, one arm carelessly covering her bare breasts to spare her nipples from the sun, “It’s more comfortable this way and I know you don’t like tits. Now let’s talk – how is it with the sexy stable boy?”

Blaine sighs and closes his eyes. He wants to feel frustrated, but he knows it’s not Kurt’s fault. “He barely speaks to me, and he is so busy with his chores that I hardly see him unless he is helping all of us get ready for our morning ride.”

If possible, he has seen less of Kurt than before he had asked for friendship. He hopes he didn’t completely scare Kurt off – he understands this time of year is busy around the estate. He only sees Rory and a few of the others in passing. Of course he sees Brittany every morning and every evening – he sighs again. “I think he’s with someone – Brittany.”

Santana lets out a loud bark of laughter and she hits him in the arm. “You dingbat, don’t you see? He’s not with Brittany, I promise you.”

Blaine opens his eyes again and squints at her, rubbing over the spot on his arm where she slapped him. “How could you possibly know? You don’t talk to him – wait,  _do_ you?”

“What? No,” she sighs and rolls back over on her stomach. She folds her arms and lays her head on her arms, facing him. “Blaine – Brittany is, she’s with me. Kurt and Brittany are to each other what  _we_  are to each other,” she bites her lip and looks at the grass. “Do you understand?”

“San,” he says softly and reaches out to touch her back. “Why – why didn’t you ever tell me? You know I wouldn’t – you know I would’ve been okay with it.”

She nods and Blaine can see tears shining in her eyes, something he rarely has seen, if ever. “I know, and I should’ve told you. Especially since you trusted me, but it’s new and I’m scared, Blaine, I’m so scared.”

“Hey,” he croaks, and pauses to clear his throat. He pulls her into his arms and doesn’t even think about how her bare breasts are pressed up against his bare chest because none of that matters right now. She is holding him tight and sniffling quietly. “San, it’s okay.” He runs his fingers through her hair and kisses the top of her head. “You – you and Brittany are being safe?”

She nods and takes a deep, shuddering breath. “We – Kurt knows, he helps us spend time together. Blaine, I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you.”

“So, he um,” Blaine swallows hard and tries to collect his thoughts. He feels as if his world has been suddenly tossed sideways and he feels dizzy. “He knows? And he – he is okay with it? With you and Brittany being,” he pauses and licks his lips, “together?”

“Blaine,” she says, and lifts her head up so she is looking into his eyes. “I think maybe that Kurt is like us. Brittany thinks so; he has never said anything to either one of us. But I think, maybe just so.”

* * *

Blaine cannot stop thinking about what Santana said regarding Kurt. He tries to sleep but ends up only tossing and turning so he gives up, dresses in his riding gear, and hurries down to the kitchen to sneak a quick meal before heading out.

When he steps into the stable, the last thing he expects to see is Kurt sitting on top of Starshine – but there he is, walking her back to her stall. He blinks rapidly to make sure his mind isn’t making it up and no, Kurt is awkwardly sliding off Starshine’s back and coaxing her back into her stall. “I didn’t know you knew how to ride.”

Kurt jerks his head in Blaine’s direction and immediately reaches up to make sure he didn’t startle Starshine. “I’m not very good, but I know how. She was restless this morning, so I took her for a walk.”

Blaine nods and takes a deep breath. He’s going to take a leap and hopes he doesn’t fall into any sort of abyss – he has to  _try_ , needs to try. “Kurt, would you like to ride with me today? I could teach you a few things.”

“Oh, I couldn’t Mr. Anderson,” Kurt shakes his head and closes the gate in front of Starshine. “I-“

Blaine boldly steps closer to Kurt and steels himself because he has to get this right, just  _has_  to. “Kurt,” he says softly and smiles. “Please say you’ll ride with me? I know today is usually your day off and – I’d really like it if you would accompany me down to the lake.”

Kurt seems to hesitate for a moment, looking everywhere but at Blaine before he finally nods. “Okay, yes.”

Blaine grins and fights back the urge to make an obnoxious cheering gesture that would definitely scare Kurt away. This will be the most time he will have ever spent with Kurt and he wants to cherish every last moment of it – even if this is all he gets, he will take it.

“Would you like to take Shortcake? She’s much less feisty than Starshine – Santana always goes for the feisty ones.”

“Oh,” Kurt says and looks back and forth between the two horses. “Sure? Like I said, I’m not very good – I won’t be able to keep up with you, I’m sure.”

Blaine grabs Warbler’s saddle to keep his hands busy, otherwise he’d do something dumb like reach out and grab Kurt’s hand or arm. “I’ve been told I’m an excellent teacher, I won’t leave your side,” he says and can’t help but keep the easy tone in his voice. He hopes he’s not taking things too far, but Kurt isn’t shying away from him so he is taking that as a good sign.

As he saddles up Warbler his heart threatens to beat right out of his chest. Every few moments he has to close his eyes and  _breathe_  to refocus his mind because this could very well not mean anything. He does not want to get his hopes up – doesn’t want to replay what Santana said to him over and over in his head. Otherwise, he may go crazy.

Riding out to the lake passes by in a blur. He stays by Kurt, giving him a tip or two as Kurt needs it but really, all he can focus on is Kurt’s smile. It’s there for the whole ride and Blaine swears that’s the best thing he’s  _ever_ seen.

When they reach the lake, Blaine dismounts first and quickly ties up Warbler. He notices Kurt is struggling to dismount so he hurries over to him and holds up his hand. “Here, let me help you. It can be different when you have nothing to steady you.”

“Thank you, Mr. Anderson,” Kurt says and takes Blaine’s hand. He throws his leg over and his grip on Blaine’s hand tightens as he comes tumbling to the ground. When he straightens his legs and looks up, his face is mere inches away from Blaine’s. “Oh, I-“

“Kurt,” Blaine breathes, refusing to let go of Kurt’s hand – thankfully Kurt isn’t making any motion drop it, either. His heart is thrumming so loudly in his chest that hethinks Kurt can probably hear it. He drops his gaze to Kurt’s mouth – which he quickly realizes is a mistake when Kurt briefly licks his lips and that’s  _it_ , he cannot hold back anymore. “Kurt, I – “

“Blaine,” Kurt says and suddenly Kurt’s voice is much stronger than Blaine has ever heard it. “Please, you can.”

Before Blaine even processes that Kurt called him by his first name he is leaning in and pressing his lips against Kurt’s and  _this_ , this is everything he ever wanted. He almost sobs with relief when Kurt pulls him closer because all this time – these  _feelings_  that for so long he was so afraid to admit to, so afraid that he would never be able to share with anyone, finally make sense. And now he’s here, kissing Kurt. Kurt, who is gorgeous and thin and broad and  _male_.

He reaches up with his free hand to cup Kurt’s jaw, slightly tilting his head to deepen the kiss. He’s simply following his instincts because he has never kissed anyone like this before.  Kurt whimpers softly and Blaine pulls back right away. “Are – are you okay? Did I do something wrong?”

“No,” Kurt says, shaking his head. “No, I rather liked that. You weren’t doing anything wrong, I just – I’ve never done anything like that before.”

“I haven’t either,” Blaine says and squeezes Kurt’s hand. “Kurt, I -,” he laughs and ducks his head. “I’ve wanted to just be able to  _talk_  to you for weeks; never did I let myself dream that I would be kissing you – that you would want to kiss me.”

Kurt bites his lip and smiles through it. “Mr. Ander-,” he clears his throat, “ _Blaine_ , why do you think I have kept my distance? I never would’ve thought,  _ever_  that you – “

Blaine shuts him up by kissing him again because Kurt’s smile makes Blaine’s whole body feel like he’s floating on air and he needs to feel Kurt’s lips against his again. He kisses Kurt until they’re reminded that they’re not alone – when Shortcake nudges them apart. He laughs and grabs her reins from Kurt’s other hand.

“Do you want to stay here for a while? Enjoy the sun?” Blaine drops Kurt’s hand reluctantly and quickly ties up Shortcake next to Warbler. “I don’t think I’m quite ready to return just yet.”

“No, me neither, Mr. …” Kurt starts and shakes his head quickly. “Sorry, that’s going to take some getting used to. I  _am_  right in that I can call you Blaine?”

Just hearing Kurt say his first name makes Blaine’s knees wobble. He is pretty sure he’s smiling so widely that all of his teeth are showing. “Of course – if only ever in private, I hate being called Mr. Anderson almost as much as I hate being called sir.”

“So this,” Kurt says, waving his hand between them. “Are we – are we to be like Santana and Brittany?”

“Oh, Kurt,” Blaine sighs happily and reaches out for him. Kurt takes his hand and Blaine pulls him close. “Would you like to be? Would you like to be mine?”

Kurt brushes his fingers along Blaine’s jawline and says nothing for a few moments, his eyes searching every feature of Blaine’s face. “You are so very, very handsome,” he says softly after a while. “I have wanted to be yours since I first saw you – I just never thought it possible.”

Blaine is so overwhelmed that he can feel his eyes pricking with tears. This boy – this  _man_  – in his arms, something he never imagined he’d ever have, wants him, thinks he’s handsome and wants to be  _his_. “You have me,” he nods. “You have me – we have to be careful, but you have me as long as you want me.”

This time, Kurt kisses Blaine and Blaine whimpers into his mouth because he feels Kurt’s lips part and who knew kissing could feel so good? Kurt’s hand slides to the back of Blaine’s neck and pulls him even closer, and Blaine doesn’t ever want to stop kissing him.

They must stop eventually, though, and Kurt only pulls back far enough to lean his forehead against Blaine’s, his hand still tight against Blaine’s neck. “Santana and Britt will help us – and we’ll help them. We can all cover for each other.”

* * *

 

Blaine doesn’t get to hold or touch or kiss Kurt again for almost another week because Jeff, Nick and Sugar are over almost every day from sunup to sundown and by the time they get back from the lake Kurt isn’t there. It takes an enormous amount of restraint for him to keep to himself every morning while they all get ready in the stable with Kurt  _right there_  but he does it, sharing secret smiles with Kurt when he knows everyone isn’t looking.

Come the weekend he races down to the stable, only slowing down to a normal pace when he is close to the doorway so Kurt doesn’t think he’s insane. He practically bounces through the doorway and his heart expands with pure joy in his chest when he sees Kurt standing there, brushing Jeff’s horse. “Hello,” he smiles.

Kurt sets the brush down and he returns the smile. “Hello.”

Blaine sees the slight flex in Kurt’s fingers and before he knows it, his feet have somehow moved him right in front of Kurt and his hands have come up to rest on Kurt’s face and he is finally, finally kissing Kurt again. He sighs into Kurt’s mouth, feels Kurt smile against his lips and his eyes slide closed because he wants to savor every possible moment of this in case he has to wait another week – or longer – before it happens again.

He doesn’t mean to do it but suddenly they’re moving – and he is pressing Kurt up against a stabilization beam. They’re still kissing – Kurt is grabbing at his waist and pulling him close and maybe, just maybe, Kurt missed him just as much as he missed Kurt this week.

Blaine flicks out his tongue and just barely brushes it against Kurt’s lips - he doesn’t mean to, but with Kurt’s mouth moving against his own, he sort of loses all track of what he’s doing. When he realizes what he’s done, he fully expects Kurt to push him away but instead Kurt groans softly and tightens his grip on his waist. So Blaine tries it again, only this time he pushes his tongue in a little further and  _this time_  Blaine is the one who groans when Kurt’s tongue meets his and he feels a spark of desire shoot down his spine.

He pulls back because he is slightly lightheaded and he is feeling things that he has never felt before. He feels –  _aroused_  – something of course he has dealt with over the years but nothing like  _this_. Certainly nothing to this extent, and never caused by another person. He is trying to catch his breath and trying to figure out what to say when Kurt lightly brushes his lips against his cheek.

“You make my heart feel like it’s going to beat right out of my chest,” Kurt says softly, and his breath tickles Blaine’s cheek. “I never knew kissing could feel like that.”

Blaine swallows hard and tucks his head against Kurt’s shoulder, wrapping his arms around Kurt’s back. “It’s like you read my mind,” he mumbles into Kurt’s neck. “I cannot control my heartbeat around you – no matter how hard I try.”

“Do you have time to get away today? Can we spend the day together?” Kurt asks, one hand slowly moving up and down Blaine’s back. “Santana and Brittany could come down to the lake with us.”

“I think,” Blaine says and presses a kiss against Kurt’s neck – he smiles when he  _feels_  Kurt shiver at the contact, “that sounds like an amazing idea.”

* * *

 

Blaine cannot remember ever seeing Santana this happy, as he watches her splash in the water with Brittany. He can hear her laughter from his spot on the grass where he sits with Kurt in between his legs, Kurt’s back pressed up against his chest. “You don’t mind sitting like this, do you?”

Kurt twists slightly so he can see Blaine and smiles. “Of course not – I enjoy being close to you,” he says and presses a quick kiss to Blaine’s chin.

Blaine hums happily and snuggles his head into the back of Kurt’s neck. Santana’s laughter has stopped and so has the splashing, so he peeks up and smiles because Santana has Brittany in her arms and they’re kissing. He brushes a kiss against Kurt’s neck and can’t help but be forever grateful that the four of them have each other for times like this – to just be themselves.

“Britt really likes Santana,” Kurt says softly. “They – they went through a lot, to get to where they are. You and I both know how difficult it is to come to terms with  _this_ ,” he says and waves his hand around in an all-encompassing gesture. “I think now that we –“

“Kurt,” Blaine says, and lifts his hand up to cup Kurt’s jaw, twisting slightly so they are facing one another. “I have never seen Santana so happy, so I will do whatever it takes to make sure that the four of us stay happy, okay? I really, really care about you. I have since that first day we met and I heard you sing.”

A slight flush covers Kurt’s cheeks and he tries to look away but Blaine keeps a steady grip on his jaw. He rolls his eyes and pushes up to press his lips against Blaine’s.

Blaine grins and slides his hand further back until it reaches Kurt’s hair. Kurt’s tongue soon finds its way into his mouth and that is still his favorite thing – every brush of contact against his tongue sends his entire body into fits of pleasure. It doesn’t take long before Kurt is moving, turning his body around so he is completely facing Blaine, and they’re still kissing, and oh, now Blaine is on his back. And Kurt is on top of him.

“This okay?” Kurt asks with a small unsure waver in his voice, his hands planted on either side of Blaine’s shoulders, one knee in between Blaine’s legs, the other just outside his thigh.

Blaine isn’t quite sure in what realm of possibility it wouldn’t be okay – he has a  _gorgeous_  man looking down at him and they’re both breathing heavier than normal. Instead of speaking he just nods and pulls Kurt down by his neck and answers with a kiss. Kurt falls flush against him and Blaine winds his other arm tight around Kurt’s lower back, which is warm and damp with sweat but it feels  _wonderful_.

Kurt’s mouth slides against his so easily now – Blaine could almost forget that it was just a week ago, right here in this grass, that they shared their very first kiss. His hand on Kurt’s neck slides up a little further into Kurt’s hair and Kurt whimpers softly. When he lets his mouth fall open far enough for his tongue to lick against Kurt’s lips, Kurt’s hips drop against his and they both gasp.

Blaine had been well aware of his own arousal but to feel Kurt’s – to feel him pressed up against him like this – he definitely wasn’t expecting it. He pulls back with a gasp and tilts his head back. “Kurt, I- “

“Sorry,” Kurt says softly and tries to move away but Blaine holds him in place with both of his arms. “Blaine – “

“No, don’t be sorry, I just need a few moments,” Blaine says, and tries to will his racing heart back to a normal rhythm. “Don’t run away,” he whispers and kisses Kurt’s forehead. “That was wonderful.”

“Blaine,” Santana calls suddenly, in an usually soft voice.

Blaine cranes his neck to see Santana and Brittany standing a few feet away, linked by just their pinky fingers. “I suppose it is about that time?”

Santana nods and tugs Brittany closer. “We’ll give you two a few more minutes? We’ll be over there.” She points over to their blankets and smiles before walking away.

Blaine turns back to Kurt and runs his fingers through Kurt’s hair. “I don’t want to wait another week to see you  - I could hardly stand it,” he says and lifts Kurt’s chin so he can press his lips briefly against Kurt’s. “Can you get away in the evening during the week?”

“It’s possible,” Kurt says after a beat. “What will we say? How will we see each other?”

Blaine kisses him again because they’re almost out of time and he doesn’t want to go – doesn’t want to give this feeling up. “I will talk to Santana and see if we can work something out. Just the two of us, I will let you know. I promise.”

Santana and Brittany approach them again and Kurt stands before helping Blaine to his feet. Before Kurt can walk away toward the horses, Blaine pulls him into a hug and they stand there for a few moments, just holding each other. Kurt feels so solid against him, so  _warm_  that Blaine is so very reluctant to let go of him when Santana brushes a hand against his arm, a silent gesture letting him know that it is definitely time to go back.

* * *

 

Apparently, Blaine is smiling constantly because one night at the supper table his parents even question why he seems to be so happy. He quickly answers that he just loves being home, loves being able to ride and loves being around his friends. They nod, accepting his answer and Blaine continues to smile because of course, he is thinking of Kurt.

As soon as he is able to leave the table, he does. Luckily, it is not completely unusual for him to take Warbler out after supper so his parents do not question him when he leaves the house. His whole body is wound tight with nerves as he tries to keep a steady pace down to the stables – he hopes Kurt was able to get away.

It has been over a week since that day at the lake with Santana and Brittany. At first, Blaine had gotten caught up with a few family obligations in the evening, and then Kurt had to tend to matters at home with his still ailing father. They had talked briefly in the mornings before Blaine’s friends started to gather, and Blaine’s heart ached every day that passed without being able to kiss Kurt.

But now, finally, they are going to spend the evening together – alone – at the lake. When Blaine enters the stable and sees that Shortcake is already missing, he breathes a sigh of relief and starts to get Warbler ready in a hurry.

He rides quickly to the lake, taking every shortcut he knows because all he cares about is what is already there waiting for him.

Kurt is sitting in the grass and staring out at the lake when Blaine approaches. He looks up and smiles when Blaine calls out a soft  _whoa_  to Warbler to make him stop. Warbler is quickly tied up next to Shortcake and Blaine jogs over to Kurt, immediately sitting as close to him as he possibly can.

“I’ve missed you,” Blaine sighs and reaches out to brush his fingers along Kurt’s jaw. “Please say you’ve missed me too – please say I’m not the only one that feels this way.”

“Oh Blaine,” Kurt smiles and leans into his touch. “I’m so very much yours I sometimes lose focus of what I’m doing – I’m so lost thinking of you,” he turns his head and kisses Blaine’s palm. “I definitely feel the same way.”

Once again, Blaine feels so completely overwhelmed that he is at a loss for words, so he does the only thing he can think of doing in that moment – he closes his mouth over Kurt’s and kisses him.

The humidity is already making his shirt cling to his back, and this makes him remember his original plan. He pulls back slightly and smiles at Kurt. “Would you like to go swimming with me?”

Kurt quickly glances at the water and nods. “I haven’t been swimming in a few years.”

“Well,” Blaine says softly and trails his mouth along Kurt’s jaw to his ear. “I think it’s been mentioned that I’m an excellent teacher.”

Blaine bounces to his feet and, completely out of habit, he starts pulling off his shirt and unfastening his pants. It isn’t until he realizes Kurt is still sitting on the grass, staring up at him with wide, amused eyes, that what he’s doing may be a bit forward. “Oh – I’m sorry, I’m just so used to – I go swimming every day with Jeff and Nick and everyone – “ he stumbles over his words, frozen with his pants around his knees.

“No, it’s um,” Kurt smiles and pushes himself to his feet. He motions for Blaine to continue. “You are just so good looking I was…” He pauses and laughs a little, shaking his head, “I was rather enjoying actually being able to look.”

Blaine steps out of his pants and reaches out his hand. “Come here,” he says softly. “Here? Tonight? When it’s just us?” He presses a quick kiss against Kurt’s mouth and inhales deeply. “You can look all you want, I want you to.”

Kurt nods and reaches for the hem of his shirt. He takes a deep breath and looks straight into Blaine’s eyes. “Will you?” He takes Blaine’s hand and places it on the hem. “Take it off for me?” There’s a slight tremble in Kurt’s fingers, but his voice is steady. He looks flushed and only slightly nervous, which is better than Blaine can say for himself.

“Oh, um…” Blaine nods dumbly and suddenly his heart feels as if it is going to beat straight out of his chest. He slowly lifts Kurt’s shirt when Kurt raises his arms and he’s pretty sure he stops breathing as soon as he drops Kurt’s shirt to the ground. He sees boys without shirts every day at school and every day here at the lake, but this is nothing like the boys at school and nothing like Jeff and Nick – this is  _Kurt._ “Wow,” he breathes, unable to form anything else coherently.

Kurt quickly unfastens his pants and lets them fall to his ankles, leaving both of them standing there in their drawers. He steps out of them and grasps Blaine’s hand. “Let’s get in the water.” He smiles softly and Blaine doesn’t need any more encouragement than that – because this is new to both of them. They’re both nervous, of course they are.

Blaine usually does a running dive into the water to get his whole body covered, but this time he walks hand in hand with Kurt until the water is up to their waists. He pulls Kurt close and wraps both of his arms around Kurt’s shoulders. “I could kiss you all evening,” he whispers against Kurt’s mouth.

“I wouldn’t mind,” Kurt smiles and closes the small gap between them so they’re pressed chest to chest with Kurt’s arms tight around Blaine’s waist.

Blaine kisses him and drags them further into the lake until the water licks across their chests. He can feel Kurt’s arousal against his own again and this time it doesn’t startle him – it’s an intense feeling, knowing that he is causing Kurt to be in such a state. He feels Kurt’s hands trail down quickly over his ass, then a little further to his thighs and suddenly he is being lifted, and his only option is to curl his legs around Kurt’s waist.

“Kurt,” he sighs happily and starts to kiss along Kurt’s jaw. He hasn’t tried this yet but he wants to know what other parts of Kurt taste like – what  _all_  of Kurt tastes like. He loosely hangs on to him, letting the water keep him afloat as he explores Kurt’s jaw and neck with his mouth. “You taste so good,” he says softly into Kurt’s damp skin.

Kurt’s hands flex on Blaine’s thighs and he leans his head back. “Blaine, you make me feel – I feel dizzy, but it’s such a good sort of dizzy.”

Blaine tightens his legs around Kurt, his hips coming flush against Kurt's lower abdomen. He kisses back to Kurt's mouth and drops his hips slightly so his cock brushes against Kurt's. “Oh, Kurt,” he moans softly, pulling Kurt's bottom lip into his mouth. “I feel dizzy too, with your body against mine. You feel so good to me.”

Hot flashes of pleasure settle in Blaine's groin as he shifts his hips against Kurt's. He can hardly focus on kissing properly because Kurt's hands are gripping his thighs and holding him tight. They're swaying in the water and every time Kurt shifts his feet, their cocks thrust together and Blaine wants this forever.

“Blaine,” Kurt moans, trailing his mouth down to Blaine's chin. “I can't – we have to go to the grass.” His fingers flex again. “That is – if you want to keep this up?”

Blaine shudders as his cock presses against Kurt's again. He tries to drop his legs but Kurt holds him tight. “Yes, of course,” he sighs, moving his head to the side as Kurt kisses down his jaw. “You feel so amazing.”

Kurt walks them slowly out of the water, keeping Blaine's legs tight around his waist and kissing constantly along Blaine's jaw and throat. Kurt's strength surprises Blaine and he wants to grip onto Kurt's arms to feel the muscles flexing. He holds on to Kurt's shoulders with one arm and drags his other hand down to Kurt's bicep, groaning out loud when his hand touches the firm muscle.

As Kurt slowly lowers him to the grass, Blaine can't help but stare at Kurt's body – wet and glistening in the moonlight and  _gorgeous_. He smiles, reaches out for Kurt and moans softly when Kurt lays on top of him. “Kiss me,” he whispers, cupping Kurt's cheeks in his hands.

Kurt closes the distances between them and kisses him briefly before pulling back, holding himself up on his forearms. “Blaine, what do you – I'm not sure I know what two men do together,” he says as a blush floods his cheeks.

Blaine isn't completely sure himself, but he has heard enough stories and gossip about what men and women do together that he can probably translate, as long as his mind is clear enough. He kisses Kurt and rolls them over. “Did you like how we were in the lake?” He drops his hips and thrusts, toes curling because it feels even better when his full weight is able to press against Kurt. “Like this? Is this okay?”

“Oh yes,” Kurt nods. He arches his back and grips Blaine's waist. “Would it be okay if,” he closes his eyes and thrusts his hips up, “I want to feel you against me and this material is soaking wet.”

Blaine stills for a moment and he has to remind himself to breathe because he's pretty sure Kurt just suggested they remove their drawers and be completely naked together. He suddenly feels self-conscious and unbelievably turned on all at the same time. “I-yeah, okay,” he nods and reaches for his own drawers only to be stopped by Kurt’s hand.

“Could I?”

“S-sure,” Blaine says and tries to work out the best way to do this in his head. He pushes away from Kurt and steadies himself on his knees, pulling Kurt up with him. He feels a hot flash twist in his gut when he sees Kurt’s stomach muscles flex and he just has to  _touch_. He trails his fingers up over the hard muscles covering Kurt’s stomach, drags his hand over Kurt’s chest and when he finally reaches Kurt’s neck he looks up into his eyes and smiles. “You’re so beautiful,” he says, and pulls Kurt toward him by the back of his head and presses their lips together.

Kurt’s slightly shaky hands reach for Blaine’s drawers and tug at them firmly, the material wet and sticking to Blaine’s skin. Blaine laughs nervously through the kiss and helps by kicking out of the offending clothing quickly before reaching for Kurt’s.

He tries not to look as he slides Kurt’s drawers down to his knees, but he can’t help it. He breaks the kiss and has to lean his head on Kurt’s shoulder to keep himself steady. Kurt’s cock is hard and so different than his own; his hands are already itching to touch it.

“Blaine,” Kurt whispers, slowly kicking his drawers away. “What – tell me what to do?”

“Do you,” Blaine swallows hard and runs his hands down Kurt’s sides, pulling him close. “Do you ever take yourself in your own hand?”

Kurt clears his throat and nods. “S-sometimes. Not often, I don’t have a lot of privacy. Blaine, your hands feel so good on me,” he sighs.

Blaine starts kissing along Kurt’s throat and grips Kurt’s hips, his thumbs rubbing circles on Kurt’s hipbones. “I’d very much like to touch you, Kurt. Will you let me touch your cock?”

When Kurt gives him a steady yes, Blaine’s eyes almost roll to the back of his head. He slowly lowers Kurt back to the ground and lies beside him. It can’t be much different than what he does to himself, or so he hopes. He wants to make Kurt feel good –  _needs_  to make Kurt feel good. That’s all he cares about right now.

He props himself up on one elbow and pulls Kurt into a kiss before slowly dragging his free hand down Kurt’s chest. He pauses when his fingers reach Kurt’s hipbone and Kurt whimpers into his mouth, pushing his hips up into Blaine’s hand.

Kurt’s skin is still damp from the water and when Blaine’s hand bumps Kurt’s cock he gasps into Kurt’s mouth. It takes him a moment to come back to reality and  _focus_ , so he licks into Kurt’s mouth and wraps his hand around the base of Kurt’s cock at the same time. Kurt whimpers again and thrusts his hips up, his hands scrambling on Blaine’s back before finally settling in Blaine’s hair.

Kurt’s cock is warm and thick and slightly longer than his own. He slowly starts pumping his hand, just trying to memorize the feel of it. Kurt is constantly gasping and moaning into his mouth so he must be doing something right. He tries to move with the cadence of Kurt’s hips but he feels a little uncoordinated and his rhythm is off, but Kurt doesn’t seem to mind.

When Kurt pulls his tongue into his mouth, Blaine is suddenly reminded of something he had heard a few boys mention at school. He wonders if he could try it on Kurt. He slows his hand down and before Kurt can protest too much, he trails his mouth down to Kurt’s jaw. “Kurt, can I try something?”

Kurt arches his back and nods quickly. “Y-yeah – what do you want to try?”

Blaine takes a deep breath and licks his lips. “I want to try – with my mouth. Would that, be okay?”

“I don’t...” Kurt tries to push himself up on one arm but Blaine urges him back down.  “Show me?”

Blaine nods and starts kissing down Kurt’s chest. Just the thought of taking Kurt into his mouth is making his cock throb, he wants to so badly. He had never thought about doing it before this very moment but now he  _wants_. He continues to kiss and lick down Kurt’s chest and belly until he reaches Kurt’s hips and he grabs one of Kurt’s hands with his free one, his other still lightly grasping the base of Kurt’s cock. He kisses across Kurt’s knuckles before taking a deep breath and glancing at Kurt’s cock.

He thinks about what might feel good if someone was doing this to him. What might feel bad – teeth, definitely. He has to be careful of his teeth. So he keeps his steady grip with his hand at the base and licks a slow line to the tip, and Kurt  _lurches_.

“Oh,  _oh_  – _Blaine_ ,” Kurt gasps. “Wha-“

Blaine looks up and Kurt is looking down at him with the widest eyes Blaine has ever seen. “Is this – okay? “

Kurt flops his head back and squeezes Blaine’s hand. “I – just – keep going,” he nods.

“Okay,” Blaine says and licks around the head before nodding to himself and opening his mouth wide enough to slide the tip of the head in. He wraps his lips around Kurt’s cock and opens his jaw a little wider so he can take a little more in.

“You, I’m in – what-“ Kurt babbles, his hips making tiny thrusts into Blaine’s hand. “It’s so – warm, I-“

Blaine doesn’t want to try to take any more of Kurt into his mouth, for fear of choking especially since Kurt can’t seem to control his hips, so he just works his tongue against Kurt’s cock. He loves feeling the weight in his mouth, against his tongue, and he really, really loves the taste of Kurt. He slides his mouth nearly all the way off and then takes him in again, moving his hand with the motion and Kurt groans loudly so he does it again. And again. And again until Kurt violently pushes him off and grabs himself just as he releases all over his stomach with a cry of Blaine’s name.

“Kurt,” Blaine says, awed. That was  _the_  most arousing thing he has ever seen in his entire life. He is so close to his own release, he can feel it tingling throughout his entire body.

Kurt is breathing hard and looking up at the stars with glassy eyes. He suddenly reaches out for Blaine and tugs him down against him. “Let me – I want you to feel that. I don’t think I could – with my mouth but – my hand? Could I?”

“Oh,  _yes_ ,” Blaine nods and bites his bottom lip hard as Kurt trails his hand down to his cock. He moans loudly when he feels Kurt wrap his fingers around him and almost loses himself before Kurt even moves his hand, he is so close.

“Tell me if this is okay,” Kurt says softly and moves his hand slowly. “I want to make you feel good.”

Blaine whimpers and buries his head in Kurt’s shoulder, shallowly thrusting his hips into Kurt’s hand. “H-harder, a little faster,  _please_ , you feel so good.”

He feels it building, his toes curl and he grips Kurt’s shoulders as he thrusts through it – releasing all over Kurt’s stomach and hand, his loud yell echoing out over the lake, making both of the horses stir. “Kurt, Kurt,  _Kurt_ ,” he whimpers, holding Kurt tight. He feels completely boneless and sated.

He presses a kiss to Kurt's chest and sighs happily as Kurt runs his fingers through his hair, his fingers dragging against his scalp. “You're amazing,” he whispers.

“That was -” Kurt kisses Blaine's forehead and takes a deep breath. “Better than anything I could've ever imagined.”

“I don't want the summer to end,” Blaine says. He feels an ache in his chest at the very thought of leaving Kurt and Kurt's arm tightens around him.

Kurt doesn't say anything for a moment, he just continues to hold Blaine and run his fingers through his hair. Finally he nods. “This is all we have then – the next few weeks? I want to be selfish and see as much as I can of you.”

Blaine feels confused suddenly and props himself up, pulling Kurt into a swift kiss that leaves both of them breathless. “Kurt – I want, I know it's only been a few weeks but when I asked if you wanted to be mine I didn't just mean the summer.”

“Oh, thank goodness,” Kurt smiles and pushes himself up on his elbows so he can kiss Blaine, immediately licking into Blaine's mouth. Their mess has dried on their bodies and it's uncomfortable, but Blaine doesn't care because Kurt is pushing him down to the ground again.

“We can write to each other,” Blaine says in between kisses, already breathless and starting to get hard again. “We can write, and I'll come home for Christmas –  _Kurt_ , I only have a year left. Will you wait a year for me?”

Kurt ducks his head in Blaine's shoulder and takes a deep, shuddering breath before nodding. “Blaine – of course I'll wait. I never thought I'd ever be able to feel this way about someone, what's one year?”

* * *

 

Blaine is boarding the train back to school before he knows it. His mind is full of the last few weeks – the days spent at the lake with Kurt, Santana and Brittany, and the occasional nights that he was able to meet Kurt at the lake. His whole body aches just thinking about not seeing Kurt until December – not being able to kiss him, or feel his body against his, or hear Kurt whisper his name as they lay underneath the stars in the grass.

As the train starts to move, Blaine closes his eyes and thinks back to the previous night. Kurt had taken him into his mouth for the first time and Blaine honestly had thought his entire body was on fire. He hadn't lasted very long, not being able to hold back from looking down at Kurt's mouth wrapped around his cock. Kurt's lips had been spit-slick, slowly sliding up and down his cock, and Blaine had shouted Kurt's name when he released – unfortunately all over Kurt's face.

Thankfully, Kurt had smiled and kissed Blaine immediately afterward, and whispered three words Blaine had never thought he'd ever get chance to hear. His heart had felt like it was going to explode in his chest and he had immediately said it back because of course he did – he loved Kurt.

And that was that – the end of his summer.

He listens to the train move and wonders if Kurt is thinking about him in this very moment. He already knows it will be hard to concentrate on his school work because he will be thinking of Kurt. Just one year, he reminds himself. He can do this.

* * *

 

_Dear Blaine,_

_Your last letter made me laugh. I'm so glad we can write candidly without fear of anyone reading. I was so afraid of mentioning anything that would get you in trouble. My family is starting to wonder who is sending me letters so I've started reading yours in the stables next to Warbler. I read some parts out loud to him, I think he misses you. He looks lonely. I make sure to let him know that you'll be back soon for Christmas._

_Can I say how much I miss you? Because I do. Sometimes I go out to the lake even though it is too cold to swim now and look up at the stars, just thinking about you. If I close my eyes and just focus on the grass underneath me, sometimes I can still feel your hands on my body._

_I think about you every day. Of course I still help Santana and Britt, just as they helped us before you left. Seeing them so happy makes me ache for you. I think I love you even more than when you left. You make me so happy, Blaine._

_Tell me more about your roommates. I share a room with my step-brother and that is bad enough, I can't imagine having to room with three other boys._

_My father is finally improving, we hope. These winter months may be hard on him but he is stronger than he has been since he collapsed so he is determined to survive the season. Please, let him survive the season. I don't know what I would do without him._

_I almost told him about you. Sometimes I get so lonely and sad without you. I know he knows something is bothering me and I always tell him everything. I hate lying to him. I almost think he might understand and be okay with it but I am so scared to tell him. I don't want to try talking to him before talking to you about it, so please. You know my father. What do you think?_

_You might think this is silly or foolish and I almost hesitate to tell you, but somehow Brittany brought me a shirt of yours and it still smells of you. I keep it hidden in my trunk and pull it out whenever I'm alone. I would sleep in it but my step-brother would notice and I don't want him asking questions._

_I'm writing this as the sun is rising, Blaine. I know how much you like to ride at this time of day. It is also the easiest part of the day for me to write, since I can get away and I do not have to start my chores just yet. I can't wait to see you again. I'm going to start counting the days._

_Love,_

_Kurt._

* * *

 

_Dear Kurt,_

_I have only been back at school for a few days but I have been thinking about you non-stop, I had to find time to write you. I already miss you. (I missed you the moment I left, but I really, really miss you now that I am miles away from you)_

_Kurt, what we shared while I was home over Christmas was something I will never forget. Thank you for loving me and trusting me enough to be with you in that way. I nearly thought my heart was going to explode when we were together, as lovers can be. I love you so much. I never want to be without you. I want to dance with you under the stars every night like we did the night before I left. I meant what I said before I left. Please come with me to California? I want to grow old with you. I can no longer imagine my life without you._

_Let's hide away in the countryside. Santana and Brittany will come with us and we can be ourselves. I want to wake up with you beside me every morning; I don’t want to have to sneak around just to see you. Doesn’t that sound wonderful? Please say yes, I don’t think I could stand it if you didn’t want to come._

_I don’t have much time to finish this letter, but I am so anxious for your response, I hope to hear from you soon. The mail is getting picked up soon and I have a study session to attend. You know I love you, Kurt. I do, with my whole heart. I will be home before you know it and then, Kurt? Please don’t keep me waiting? Please tell me you’ll spend the rest of your life with me in California._

_Think of me often, because you occupy my thoughts at every possible moment._

_Love you with everything I have,_

_Blaine_

* * *

 

The best parts in life are the ones that you never expect. Even just two years ago, Blaine would’ve never pictured having the life he has now. He is wonderfully content and surrounded with all the love in the world that he could ever ask for.

California is beautiful, and his horses love the open land he bought for them. He rides with Santana almost every morning and even starts teaching Brittany how to ride so she can ride with Santana occasionally.

Their home is tucked away and extremely private with enough land surrounding them that Blaine is thinking about starting a vineyard. He knows he can’t spend his days just riding horses and lying in bed with Kurt. Although he’d sure like to try.

Kurt stirs beside him and Blaine turns his head to look at him. He smiles when he sees Kurt’s eyes blinking open. “Good morning, my love.”

Kurt groans as he stretches and cranes his head to look out the window. “It looks more like afternoon; you let me sleep in again?”

“Of course,” Blaine says before rolling on top of Kurt, the sheets dragging along with him. He starts peppering kisses all over Kurt’s face until Kurt laughs and tells him to stop. “Fine,” he sighs and kisses him on the mouth. “Better?”

Rolling his eyes, Kurt runs his hands down Blaine’s bare sides until he grips Blaine’s hips. “So, what is on the agenda today? All I need to do is finish my letter to my father, let him know that you’re treating me right.”

Blaine hums happily and lays his head on Kurt’s shoulder. He doesn’t have any plans for the day – doesn’t have to. He may take Santana with him into town for a few things later, but that can always be put off till tomorrow. He has everything he wants, right here. In his arms. And now that he is able to wake up next to Kurt every morning like he wished for? He’s not planning on letting go of him anytime soon.

_Fin_


End file.
